What if I was to tell you that your kids really know more than you think they do and much of the time they know more than you do? For some parents that is a hard pill to swallow. But let's look at it a bit deeper. Remember back to when your child was just born? Did you have to tell her when she was hungry? Or when he should go to sleep? Or did they just know? And as they got older, did you, like most parents, begin to take control over those life styles telling them what to eat and when and how long to sleep? I know I did that, believing that I knew better than they did what they needed.
I had bought what all of the "experts" said and it didn't always go so well for my kids. I wonder what would have been different for my kids, and for that matter for me, if there had been a level of trust and knowing from the parents that kids will choose for themselves what will work best for them. We all know the struggles we get when we try to make kids go to sleep when they don't want to or try to keep them awake when they are dog tired. How much more joy and ease would happen if you let your child choose their bedtime and learn from their experiences-even at the earliest of ages. Do you listen to them when they tell you that they aren't hungry or that they don't like a certain food? Could it be that their body doesn't need that at that time? How much awareness do we steal from them in telling them what we think is what they need instead of coaching them to ask questions about what they require for optimum health and happiness? What if each person has different requirements? Can we be in allowance of that and get creative in how we can honor each other in that way?
If you observe animals in nature, they don't control their offspring, but rather they teach them to be aware by modeling their own awareness around danger and finding what they need to survive. Perhaps our problem is that we have had our awareness turned off for so long that we don't know how to model it for our kids. Could it be that we could learn a thing or two from them while they are young and still have some awareness? If we let go of our judgments and limiting beliefs and open up to new possibilities will our kids have what they need to create their own wonderful and amazing lives?
As our children get older, if we have trusted them to choose choices that will work for them and have allowed them to learn from those choices we will be able let go of our worry, knowing that we have empowered our kids to be aware and have given them a space to be confident that they do know what is best for them. It is never too late to begin the process. We all would like to have such confidence and the freedom to choose.
If you observe animals in nature, they don't control their offspring, but rather they teach them to be aware by modeling their own awareness around danger and finding what they need to survive. Perhaps our problem is that we have had our awareness turned off for so long that we don't know how to model it for our kids. Could it be that we could learn a thing or two from them while they are young and still have some awareness? If we let go of our judgments and limiting beliefs and open up to new possibilities will our kids have what they need to create their own wonderful and amazing lives?
As our children get older, if we have trusted them to choose choices that will work for them and have allowed them to learn from those choices we will be able let go of our worry, knowing that we have empowered our kids to be aware and have given them a space to be confident that they do know what is best for them. It is never too late to begin the process. We all would like to have such confidence and the freedom to choose.