After playing with them a bit on asking some questions about what would make a person awesome and what were their specific gifts, both boys were able to state with confidence that, 'Yes I am Awesome!" repeatedly in my presence. As soon as mom showed up, things went back to the way they were and they said that they weren't awesome. Interesting huh?
How comfortable is it to be around others who feel little and insignificant? And how easy is it to be confident in such company? And then how do you feel when you are around people who acknowledge that they are awesome and amazing? Do you feel uncomfortable around those people? Hmmm, verrry interesting. Kids are no different. I wonder if these boys were so in tune to their mother's point of vew of herself that they could not give themselves permission to be the confident, aspiring and awesome boys that they truly BE and just how uncomfortable that would be for them not having anyone to acknowledge their awesomeness!
This is why when parents can move beyond their issues, pains, sufferings and ideals of being small and insignificant and step into all that they can be in such amazing awareness and confidence they model and give their kids permission to do likewise. They aren't sending mixed messages. Kids can be more clear on who they are and what they are capable of being and doing. It is possible to get set free from what ails you- physically, mentally and emotionally. The first step is to simply ask a question like, "What is this all about?" and "What can I do to change this?" and then watch and see who or what shows up in your life as a possibility for you. Begin to allow yourself to acknowledge what is amazing, different, unique and fantabulous about you.
It is true that when we change ourselves we change the world, including our kids. What kind of change would you like to be?